Families Of The Woke Military

“This has nothing to do with mission readiness. This crap is corrosive, and our government is pushing it.

The woke military is using its influence to annihilate the social order.

The result is emasculated fathers, enraged and violent sons, anxiety-ridden mothers, and oppressed girls.”

By Rod Dreher  |  The American Conservative

A reader writes:

“I wrote you recently about the loss of the transcendentals in the Western church, especially my own parish. I wanted to write concerning another matter which I encounter at work every single day: the woke military. I work at a Catholic affiliated facility which cares largely for the children of military families.

Let me begin by describing the kids we try hard to help. We care mostly for teenaged children, though younger and younger kids are being seen. Girls outnumber boys 2 to 1 and they are afflicted with far deeper and broader issues than the boys. It’s not even close.

Of the girls, probably everyone identifies as gender fluid, queer, or gay. Even if they are exclusively attracted to the opposite sex, they do not consider themselves straight or heterosexual because of internet culture and peer pressure. Nearly half of our girls identify as trans, they have preferred pronouns and preferred names, the whole nine (They being the most popular pronoun right now. The confusion this creates would be comical if it wasn’t diabolical). Hell hath no hissy fit like one of these girls who is ‘dead named’, that is, called by her real, legal name given at birth. What they present themselves as is another story: few of these dress or act like boys, they just don’t want to be feminine.

The main cause of the girls’ involvement with us is suicidality, either ideation or attempt or both. Depression, anger, anxiety, and drug use follow closely behind.

The boys are normal stock compared to the girls. Few consider themselves to be gay (I think we only have one currently). In my time at the institution, only one has ever considered himself transgender. He presents in every way as a boy wanting to be a boy (except the preferred pronouns and name).

The main admitting issues with the boys are anger and depression with suicidality sometimes presenting. Drug use and pornography addiction are rampant among the boys.

Most staff just go along with the names and pronouns to keep the peace. Other are true believers in the trans cause. A few of us, when we speak, write, or engage, avoid the names and the pronouns altogether. It’s exhausting and presses the English language to its breaking point.

Therapeutically, many of us see this sexual confusion for what it is: these kids want to be anything other than who they are. It’s not merely unbridled self-expression: it’s hateful self-suppression. This is especially true of the girls. The femininity hoisted up as beautiful in our culture is ugly and oppressive as hell. We’ve had three suicide attempts ending in hospitalization in the past month.

This entire generation of school-aged children has been crushed by the closures of schools during the pandemic and the disaster which is our culture. Some go to DoD schools, some to swanky private schools, most to public schools. All are woefully behind both socially and academically. Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) diagnoses are skyrocketing. It’s astonishing, Mr. Dreher. There have already been issues in the schools with standards slippage but we’re in a precarious position. Most of our kids cannot form whole sentences, use proper grammar, or spell basic words.

For the most part, these are perfectly capable children who could be achieving in any school. We all acknowledge that they are having a rough go at life. However, when you engage them with their social and academic history over the last two years, you quickly realize it didn’t have to be this way. In fact, it wasn’t going to be this way. We’ve failed them and they are suffering in every way imaginable.

And that brings me to the parents. It may not sound charitable, but I have seen it proven true too many times to deny it now: these kids are the products of their families. Families they’ve been spending a lot of frustrating time with over the last few years. As our societal response to the virus has been detrimental to marriages, so too the whole family. Probably half of the children come from marriages which are intact. The next largest group are divorced and splintered families. Then homosexual families both intact and not, and then adoptive or legal guardian families. All military.

Now, most of our families (especially the dads) with a kid identifying as trans, are uncomfortable with it. What father wants to see his little girl like this? Lord, have mercy on us. Some families come right out and say No to it all. Some families, lead by aggressive, woke white women and silent, passive husbands, shame staff for ‘dead naming’ their daughters, even by accident. (I was wrong, Hell hath no hissy fit like a triggered progressive mother.)

As an institution affiliated and not operated by the diocese, it is like many hospital systems which were founded as Catholic charities but have disassociated from episcopal authority, or just ignore it entirely. Without a revival, this place won’t make a change to its practice because it is just too lucrative. The DoD is pouring massive amounts of money into this place.

The stance the facility has taken right now is an uneasy compromise. We do not necessarily endorse gender dysphoria diagnoses but sometimes adopt the names and pronouns as a peacekeeping measure with a child to address suicidality or substance abuse. As an institution, we fall back on ‘legal’ names because of the ‘paperwork’. We’ve already been told that if a child changed her name, we would gladly go along with it. What’s legal is the principal. That’s no solid ground but it appears to be where we are at for now: please the donors and secure the federal funding.

Would we be getting that DoD money if we took a principled stand on traditional Catholic sexual ethics? Would we be getting clients if we said that the gender confusion couldn’t be swept under the rug?

The pressure on military members, especially men, especially officers, is immense. No wonder so many of them are quiet in our meetings. No wonder so many of them look crushed and hopeless, doing whatever it takes to keep their child alive, keep their little girl from ending her life. No wonder they look so demoralized. A misbehaving child can destroy a promising career in the military. Speaking out against gender ideology can do the same.

This has nothing to do with mission readiness. This crap is corrosive, and our government is pushing it. The woke military is using its influence to annihilate the social order. The result is emasculated fathers, enraged and violent sons, anxiety-ridden mothers, and oppressed girls.”

My God.

If we want to save our children, what do we do? Seems like staying out of the woke military makes sense. Thoughts, readers? Are you seeing the same thing at your place of work? Within your family, or social circles? Is there something particular to the military about this, or is it general in society?

Lord have mercy, think of these poor dads on deployment, having to worry about their children back home getting sucked into the trans cult — PROMOTED BY THE US MILITARY!